My body has changed. I did not mind it when my bump was bigger and bigger week by week during pregnancy. I waited first for nausea, then for bubbly-feeling movement, cravings, wormy wave, kick which could be seen outside, first hiccup, first stretched mark... Recently there is so many women who will tell you that motherhood is not easy. Hormones make you different person, someone stuffed your tummy and then left, trampled your vagina and pulled breasts. Your brain is a wreckage during baby blues.
So I had to go through so many of this experiences and impressions when I wanted to find any valuable article about firsts weeks of being a mum. And I am sorry for all women who feel like that. It must be horrible. The thing which terrifies me even more is those women do not have anyone to talk about. World is as it is and does not care if you feel bad. Even there is so much pressure recently to show everyone that motherhood is not a fairytale. I would go further and I will say it very simple. Motherhood is like a life. You expect prince on white horse and even if he comes onto, hooves are dirty, full of mud and back is dusty. Same with motherhood. First smiles come, but apart of those there is plenty of yellowish nappies, cheesy-milky stains everywhere, lack of sleep and house full of scream no-one-knows-why. And I am saying: life is good. As far as you are able to believe and manage that. Often not by yourself as we live in a herd. Just... ask for help and let it go.
Everything will change. And my first thoughts were not regretting my previous life, were rather just  a question: "how we lived before?". I do not know.
I have stretched marks. Not even one appeared during pregnancy, but in few days when my baby was born. On tummy, thighs and breasts. And you know what? I think is normal. How could I produce new skin during those nine months? My body grew a new human so I assume it just forgot about few inches of skin here and there. Is it a catastrophe? Nope. Am I attractive? Well ask my husband, his opinion interest me the most. But I feel beautiful. I feel like a women. Not anymore a girl.
I have huge breasts. I breastfeed so they are full of milk and will change for sure in the future again and again. They are tempting for my hungry eater. And they are like miracles producing food, safe cushions for day naps and they are starring confidently on men passing by me. I always dreamed about bigger breasts and when they changed over two sizes I am thankful I was rather small sized complainer before.
I have scars on my vagina. Like in every natural birth pushing baby out was not without consequences. Episiotomy in Ireland is rare procedure and is implemented once advised by midwife. Also they do not do stitches which I know from Poland - separated, every single tide up near to skin. Instead it is a one string threaded over skin like a lace. They dissolved after a week and left small painless scar.
I was bleeding for six weeks. After nine months without period it is still a win! And honestly it was not bothering so much as I did not have obviously period cramps. When I fed, from time to time, I felt few contractions as uterus was shrinking to normal size.
My acne is back. I was pimple-free for nine months. God! Perfect skin! And now I am without pattern regulated by my cycle. But honestly it is not so bad as it was before pregnancy! And when I see anything popping on my face I use the most natural and cheap remedy: breast milk. Nothing ever worked so effectively!
I can walk fast again, I see my toes, lost over 10 kilos without any special diet, I eat donuts again, can polish my feet nails without a trouble, shave lower parts and seeing what I am doing. I can sleep during a day as much as I want, go to bed early and after opening my eyes see little smily face, which is waiting for hug, familiar smell, sip of freshest babycino ever. Lucky me I found benefits of mum's life, lucky I can talk about my fears in reality, lucky I have someone who noticed the woman.

Hospital. Who likes them? I do not. My first thoughts always go in sick direction. There is obviously great benefit of giving birth in hospital as if you have any risk there will be always an army of doctors and midwives to help you and your child. But! If you are healthy women and the little is fine why someone is trying to lie you down in bed and treat you like sick. No it is not a huge tumor or sore appendix in your tummy! It is a new screaming life. And I think it is sometimes forgotten so much!
Researches show that c-section rates recently increased and they are between 19-38% of total deliveries in different maternity units in Ireland. If there is a need for that, go for it, well run for it! That is the only chance for you and thanks God for that. But what about those electives sections, planned and scheduled to every second? Is there so many women too posh to push?
I am huge fan of home deliveries. Not extreme free births, as it is good to have with you someone experienced just in case and for your peace of mind. I did not have many options which could speed up naturally my labor and I was almost chained to delivery bed. But I had in my mind huge believe "I can do it" and I was brave enough to ask for being next to bed on a ball. And I am happy with all what happened. Never felt guilty I could not tick all boxes in my birth plan. So do not yourself!
After late night delivery I just wanted to go home as soon as possible. I was down in ward about 4am, taken down on wheelchair, climbed to bed, trying to fall asleep with my baby in the glass cot. And even I had so many things too feel like home, I could not. I was in hospital. And she was crying so loudly. And I felt guilty, because the rest of women probably could not sleep! There was, including me, 5 of us. But next day 2 were gone home and nobody new came. I was experiencing every second of being a new mum and new woman inside myself, so I did not really want to talk with anyone. I just smiled to them and that was enough for me. For most of the time we did not see each other as we were separated by curtains. My baby was stubborn and very sleepy. But on the other hand hungry and in need to be just next to the only person she have known, her mummy. I decided to breast feed, which I did attempted in delivery suite. But it was such a new experience and suddenly nothing worked. All positions which I saw on antenatal classes and breastfeeding workshops were just hopeless. And I felt hopeless. Especially just after delivery, when I did not know that my baby did not need to eat much. Even one suck should be considered as a success. But that was the only moment when I met totally unpleasant person in a hospital. That was a midwife who was not present during my labor nor delivery and honestly even today I have no idea where she came from. She pulled my breast, stuck in baby's mouth and said: "that's how you should do it". Then she screamed at my husband who did skin to skin contact with the baby: "she's cold, that's why she's crying". I did not catch her name neither remember her face, but if only I would made huge complain. Lucky her!
My bed was comfy even it was much older then that in delivery suite. I have enough space for my stuff. I was surprised by quality of food. Portions were big enough and there was always a choice of two dishes and there was even a dessert! That is such a different comparing to Polish hospitals. My husband could be with us for most time during a day. There was few breaks for meals and resting. I felt like a wreckage physically, just sore, with kind of pain which I never felt. And next to me I had the most beautiful creature in whole world. So I could do anything and cross every hurting edge and border. So my main activities during hospital stay was crying over her beauty, eating donuts and trying to feed. It was hard. I had plenty of colostrum. When she just sucked, which was already a challenge, she felt asleep. And again, again, again.. Then we were found by a great midwife. Young girl, who showed us position which I had never seen. And it worked! She ate, had wet nappies and I could not believe. After 12 hours we were ready to go home. But I decided... to stay one night more. I was just afraid something would go wrong and I would panic. I actually wanted also my husband would  have proper sleep, before we would be together. And feeding were going great. Next day we were discharged and we went home. I mean walking. First time with buggy. And I would not change that for a ride of any car. Even it took for me a while and we did about 300 or 400 meters that was another point, which I could be proud of. Our new life was just about to start, our new little flatmate was just about to move in. I will not surprise you, that was the most exciting change of our life.

My hospital stay was quite short. I was a bit afraid of that as I did not choose private care, so I could not be by myself in room. We were down from delivery ward at 4 pm. Three hours took to give a birth to placenta, make some stitches, to hug my baby skin-to-skin and eventually to get tea and toasts. And believe me that was the best tea with milk and the most delicious toast with raspberry jam and marmalade (with sugar!) which I have ever had. Baby Z. was weighted, measured, she was given vitamin K and at the end dressed in our baby grow, hat and wrapped up in blanket. She was like a small christmas present!
My husband was all the time with us. Well with a small break! I decided at the end of my pregnancy I wanted to keep my placenta and encapsulate it. So someone had to take it home and that was obviously him.
It may sound for you disgusting, for me it was so natural that my only concern was just price. I have read many articles and opinions. I watched also interesting BBC documentary: Childbirth all or nothing , which shows 4 different ways of giving a birth. Some of them were for me kind of extreme, but I am far away from judging anyone. There was no way there I would follow in 100%, but actually this short film just convinced me in my decisions. I had that luck my pregnancy yoga teacher, Gail is also an expert in placenta encapsulation. So when I came for the first yoga class and found out she can prepare my placenta I was sure I would go for it.
All signs on earth tried to directed my thoughts to that. There was even recently an article in Irish Times  about benefits of placenta consuming. You can find there all basic information, which you may be interested in. I just want to tell you how it was for me even I can not compare it.
If you have doubts, are totally against that practice or just disgust, please do not read it.

I got all instructions from Gail how we should transport and store the placenta. It was simple. I was also given a form by hospital as they had to ensure I was decided to dispose placenta by myself.
After delivery placenta is always examined by midwife as it is important to make sure whole tissue was excreted and nothing left in womb as later it may cause bleeding. In 30 minutes placenta should be kept in cold place. It may be in cooler bag full of ice or just in fridge. As we live 3 minutes from hospital there was not big effort to take it home and just store it in fridge. My husband made then all arrangement and Gail collected placenta day after. All process of encapsulation is long, as tissue has to be dehydrated, powdered and than placed in those small capsules. I got a small jar of about hundred capsules just on the day when we were going back home.
So what about those two days? I was afraid of my hormones. I just wanted to enjoy beginning of new life so I asked Gail to separate three small raw pieces of placenta and they were made into smoothie. It sounds disgusting I know. But it was blended with berries and honestly it tasted just like regular berry smoothie. It was just full of iron and even if it was only a placebo, I just did felt good.
I did not suffer of any baby blues. I was crying, but all my tears were just like "Oh my God she is just so beautiful!".
I did not any problem with my milk supply. I did not loose my hair and they were not even thiner, weaker or so after - still long and well kept. My body has been healing very well. I was out after just few days. In a week I walked as usual. After 6 weeks of taking capsules I feel just normal and I am back in my shape with few kilos over my usual weight.
I do not know if I am just so healthy that my body and mind recovered rapidly or it really was the placenta. I can just say every autumn and winter I suffer from lack of sun and I am more like a bear - can sleep through those seasons. I am liable to my moods, seasons, weather, my cycles, hormones and, I believe, many others. But now I am just fine. Happy. And as a mammal I would recommend to my friend breastfeeding and consuming a placenta. It is for me part of nature and part of motherhood.

I have read thousands of birth stories before I gave birth to my daughter. There was always something frightening and very exciting. I was just ready to experience this moment myself and I think I wondered all my life how it is going to be. Maybe it became a little bit obsessive, but I can tell that all thoughts which came to my mind at the end of pregnancy where great preparation for that big event. I did not know what to expect in Irish hospital and after many stories of Polish friends, who still live in the country, I was scared. I spent some time watching on you tube documents about birth and pretty good series: Midwifes, which was taken in UK. It was just great to see women (mostly!), who are devoted to their job. Such an underrated profession in Poland!

I had a luck also to meet few good midwives, who were very helpful through all my pregnancy. I was perfectly fine for all that time. Even tough I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes and had huge swollen feet, when Irish weather was tropical in summer. But my sweet disease meant my baby could be bigger size then usual or I might have more water. Any of those  could be a reason to induce my labor and bring baby earlier to this world. 

I made a plan. I put all my expectations and suggestions on fancy paper, printed few copies - one for my chart, others just in case. I was sure I did not want any interventions. As much natural labor and delivery as it could be, that was my goal. I kept in my mind that everything might go totally differently, but it was for the most of pregnancy just like a blink. 

Firstly I taught she will be born earlier. My due date was on 22nd of September, but we have heard on antenatal classes we should be prepared from 1st of September and that would be just normal. So we were. My husband picked up my every call with question: "everything ok?". And it always was. 

As a diabetec I had one extra scan just for check of baby size and amount of amniotic fluids. I felt very heavy. Like a  huge ball. I was already on maternity leave and cleaned up our house 10 times. Windows twice. I made a nest and... nothing happened. 

Scan showed baby was in normal size, expected weight should be about 3.6kg (about 7lb), which is just fine and my body should handle that. But I had polyhydramnios - not much, but still I was full of water. Apart of that everything was fine and that was the reason why doctors wanted to treat me as a normal patient. So I had one week. Went for my last yoga class in Harmony Yoga Ireland  with great teacher Gail. I think in this crazy natural induce attempt I ate all the most spices dishes on earth, drunk raspberry leaf tea twice or even more a day, ate pineapple (even I should not) and made love so many times. And nothing. Two days before d-day I had appointment and agreed  for sweep, which was attempted, but did not make any difference. My body and my cervix was ripening quite well and it was just slowly process. Baby was kicking as usual or even more. Hiccups two or three times per day. And I could not believe that any women feel decrease of movement. I felt same, just there was not enough room for all those wriggles. 

Week after I had another appointment. And that was it. I could not be treated anymore as normal, even she was still fine there was a risk, so decision was made - I had to be induced. That meant for me most of my birth plan was pointless. I would not give birth in pool. I would not walk and dance and have a tea during first stage of labor. I will be in hospital. In bed. With monitor. But all what mattered for me - I will be not anymore a ball and will have my baby in arms. 

So let's give a birth next day! 

I packed everything one more time. We went to bed earlier as we should be in hospital at 8 am. But being induced is more about patience. I was not a priority, that is obvious, as anyone else who is in labor is going first. I was monitored on assessment unit twice during that day. And apart of increased -crazy movement of baby, which was odd for midwives, I was just fine. 

We waited all day. It was sunny Wednesday, 20 degrees, great weather like in summer. We were home, waiting most of the time, had a proper lunch and then dinner. I checked my sugars for very last time and about 7 pm I got a call to come to hospital. So we took last photo as a family of two and we were just excited. We were going for magic. To come back as a 3 people.

I had a great room, which was called at that day "express room", as all births went there very fast. But I said to myself I would take time if I would need to. 

About 8 pm doctor broke my water. I hoped I could wait if anything will start naturally, but they decided to give me drip with oxytocin straight away. I just hate hospitals, syringes and tubes in hand. I did not want to feel ill, lying down on bed and being medicalized. Ugh. And they made me so. And I wanted to focus, just focus on that what would be my part and depend on me. 

First contractions came few minutes after introducing a drip. But they were not very painful. I talked with midwife and a student, we went through my birth plan even though it was not adequate to the situation. And I asked. Yes, the pool was available tonight to give a birth. And I was here not there. About 9 pm I felt contractions were pretty stronger. But I also felt I could cope and manage them. My husband was observing monitor which showed the baby's pulse and strength of contractions. Sometimes he knew before me they were coming. And he made a game to distract me and compared all contractions calling which was the top score. I did not bring any music. First I wanted but then I said I would not be able to listen to anything after labor in same way. So they had something on computer - few songs, which I do not remember at all. But it was pleasant to have some background not only a silence. 

The only thing which I could do was jump off the bed and go to birthing ball. I was chained like a cow. And I felt if I would sat on a ball that would speed up labor. And I think it did. Contractions where much stronger and I had impression I was a big toothpaste and something tried to squeeze me along. But that was good pain. More intensive as midwife said, as on drip everything go stronger and faster. It just hurts. Very much, but I tried to focus, to look inside my body and listen to my instinct what to do. So I bended, I waved on the ball according to contractions. I was a contraction. Once at a time. I did not think about the next one or the previous. I focused just on now and here so I jumped into every single moment of that pain and rested for every single break which were becoming shorter and shorter. My husband instead of playing that game as he saw my body is scoring just higher and higher he was just there. Behind me, touching my lower back with his warm hands, bringing me cold wet cloth, glass of water, talking, encouraging, walking to bathroom with me, breathing, stroking, cuddling and holding my hand when I needed. I was a big thought. A huge focus. 

I came back to bed when I had to be examined. I was 70% effaced. I hoped for 6-7 cm but it was just effacement. Long way. But I think I did not wait too long for dilation. At some stage pain was so overwhelming and breaks between contraction were so short I could not think anymore. I went to bathroom and I wanted to quit. Just to go home and came back next day. I even asked myself if I want epidural, but my husband convinced I might try first gas and air. Came back to bed and felt really bad. I took gas and tried to breathe through. I am not good in such things and I felt sick. I was dizzy and my mind was just objecting even gas as not natural remedy. On the other hand I was just tired. It was 11.30 pm and I wanted this baby out. So I agreed that gas will help me relax. So I breathed through it. And after few minutes I found this so enjoyable I could not believe. Literally I just felt high. So nothing bothered me anymore. I was lying, waiting for another contraction and they were just coming. One by one. I hold my husband hand so strong he could not believe I am able to do so. I was 7 cm and it went pretty fast. And after some time of that lethal phase I had to push. I felt such a big urge. But midwife was telling me to stop. My body tried to convinced me just to push. Something was coming. So they decided to examined me again after 20 minutes of previous one. She even did not have to check my cervix. The head was so close they had to rush with lights and all equipment. My husband and the student was asked to hold my legs when I would go through active phase. But they were so shocked of nature's miracle they forgot and I had to look after legs myself. We were nearly there. Somewhere else a baby was crying. For this stage I could not use gas anymore. And we did it without epidural. I was pretty proud of myself and I was so terrified to push a watermelon through my birth canal. It was not easy. It did hurt, but it hurt totally different way than all contractions. It was like a putting fingers in a wand. Or maybe not. Maybe it was just like a fire. We were to far to stop and to close to start properly. And that is what midwife do. She knew I will panic and she knew what to do. And somehow my husband looking at head of our baby knew what I should do. Everyone says pushing is like two steps forward, one back. So I did try my best to bring this head outside and when it did happened I do not know what forces did the rest. Well for sure that was me - pushing, breathing when midwife asked, but I have no idea where they came from. And suddenly she cried. She just did and, I am sorry, all that pain disappeared. All mothers will tell you that, pain was just gone. I felt sore. I felt my tummy was empty. No more kicks. I felt all bloody waters in such amounts I could not believe. I felt pushing placenta. But all of that were like an echo, like a fade background. She was crying. She was all wet, in mucus and blood and I expected it will be kind of disgust, but it was not at all. I fell in love. My husband fell in love. Now we were 3 persons. Me, my man and my little girl. That was all what mattered. It was 1.13am, 29 of September 2016, Thursday. It was windy night and it was raining. I imagined all leaves just started to fall from trees, all orange-brown-greenish, as I found them under my feet on Friday afternoon. Early autumn. My beloved season brought by my baby. 

When I lived in Poland I was against all celebrations which weren't typically our tradition. I have never given sweets to little Poles on Halloween. Nope. It was for me just ridiculous. Kids seeking one day for treat and another going to light up a candle on family's graves. Maybe this is a patriotism which I follow? My question considering any behavior of children was always same - where are parents? Those adults who should teach their little ones traditions and give them a full background of what is going on every year and why. The question sticked up to me and I still do ask very often about that. I moved out Poland and moved in to Ireland. A place where Halloween has a great tradition and the place, where those celebrations are just where they should be. So am I hypocritical when with delight filling up their bags with sweets?

I would never also celebrate a baby shower if I would be pregnant in Poland. We do have rather tradition or superstition to not buy anything while expecting. Which for me it is a bit old-fashioned. So again, I am, where I am and baby shower is a big deal here! 

I did not even think about organizing one. Did I ever said  I have been blessed with the best husband on the earth? So I am saying. Secretly he, some of my friends and colleagues did amazing baby shower Sunday afternoon. Maybe it was not fancy like on blogs with house full of flowers' garlands. But there was thousands of balloons blown by real lungs, huge lilies bouquet, plates full of sugar-free bakes, de-alcoholised red wine and bunch of ladies, so two men who were just loudly screaming on me "SURPRISE". Sounds like movie scenario! And no doubts - all of us ladies even if it is like a daub, from time to time dreams of surprise parties, breakfasts in bed, sunsets over romantic beaches, glasses of wine beside a fireplace and big hairy cuddly arm. That's who we are. 

I had a principle when I found out we will have a little girl: NO PINK. It is not about I do not like it. I am just an enemy of boys/girls colors definition. So there was also a practical side: if the little girl accidentally would appear as little boy, no harm! 

By the way I saw recently smart 8 years old girl debating about boys/girls clothes. See it below - you won't regret! And I totally agree with her! 

When I was a teenager I bought my first pink sleeveless shirt and I called that in my mind an alternative pink. I just did not want to feel that someone just determined my sex. I wanted to fell like a girl or even young woman, but just not through color or cute cloth. I wanted to be perceived as them just through who I was. 

So I wanted the same for my little. But the party was never for me a big shower of gifts, however everybody brought even little un-pink present. For me it was the most peaceful moment, a bit crazy, when everyone could lie down a hand on my bump and feel her little kicks and wriggles. That was it. At this very moment my closest world truly knew she existed inside. She was like imaginable picture, similar to those from scans, who was not only loved by her future mum and dad, but was admired by all few palms catching her movements. I do care and appreciate so much who could make and be with me at that moment, as it was magical and very emotional, but at same time I do not care and don't regret anyone who did not want to come. I am not sure if baby showers are for mums or for babies. I did got few tips and advises, but today I can just say all that matters what was and still is a support from those who called in at the Sunday and my faith in maternal (and very often paternal) instinct over all tips which I have heard or read. And the most pleasant thing now is to wrap up little Z. in the towel or cuddle with little safe-belt-rabbits in her car seat she was given at that day and send photos to our lovely donors! Here you are :)

And now I am looking forward to make some Jack-o'-lanterns to show kids from our neighborhood that "yes we do have sweets" and to little Z. an Irish tradition. On Polish following All Saints and All Souls days we will light up candles and send our thoughts to all those in heaven. We do live here and we do remember about our origins. That's our sought golden mean.

I was waiting for very long time. And could not believe one day she really will be here. I started 10th month of pregnancy so I was exhausted. I did loved being pregnant - all kicks, even those small ones in half way through, when autumn was so far away from us were for me like a blessing.

At some stage when midwife on antenatal classes said: your bag needs to be prepared at least 3 weeks before the term, I did my birth plan. I expected all natural, unforgettable moments, floating in pool in pain obviously, but also with great cooping. I will not say now it was a bullshit. It was the plan which actually never happened. But it was also the plan which got me through totally different scenario.

I packed my hospital bag and half of it was absolutely unnecessary.

I got a list of things from hospital which I should take. Quite long. And I actually felt like someone will check my suitcase if I have everything. And they would probably also weight it like in low cost airlines...

I checked hospital list and here it is what I had packed and what I can say after my stay:
1. Birth plan - was great to have a spare copy, but in my chart was already one. My midwife went through that with me and I even did not to have bend to get my from bag
2. An old t-shirt/night shirt for labour - in my case it was nothing old. I bought new dress for labor. I still wanted to be a woman, look as myself and feel comfortable. So I got dress for labor - Granatova, made in Poland, which I still use as a great option for breastfeeding. Unfortunately website is only in Polish, but if you do need advise, let me know or check IG or contact through FB.
3. Wide opening nightshirt/pyjamas if breastfeeding - as above. I had two dresses. Blue one for labor and striped after delivery.
4. An old pair of socks for labour (your feet can get cold in labour) - I had them but did not use at all. I was actually all the time very warm and sweaty.
5. Personal items: toiletries, tissues, lip balm - do not expect you will do full make up in hospital after delivery. Even when you will be just about to go home. I just was not in mood to stand in front of mirror and do anything with my face. I was actually not at all in mood to stand. I run out of tissues. It was just because most of the time I was looking at my daughter and crying so much. I was just in love and for me she was such a beauty I could not stop my tears. Lip balm - well I used it as usual not more often or so.
6. Wet wipes and handbag size alcohol gel dispenser for personal infection control - nope. First of all there was plenty of those dispensers in my hospital, second: I am not a big fan if killing all bacterias (especially those good ones) on my hands. There was also small wash basin in my room, which was quite handy to wash.
7. Birthing ball (if desired) - it was available in my delivery ward.
8. TENS machine (if desired) - I have never considered to use one.
9. Breast pads - I took plenty of them and actually I did expected a flood. But it never came, at least not in hospital. I did not use any of those disposable ones even till now, as I bought washable bamboo pads which are really comfy.
10. Support bra/nursing bra if breastfeeding - I did not use any. I just needed to get to my breast rapidly as my daughter was inpatient newborn.
11. Sanitary towel packs - I did struggle a lot with those which I bought. They were kind of super slim something, full of plastic and glue. I had change them very soon for proper thick towels made with organic cotton. I just could feel my skin breathed.
12. Disposable/old knickers for after the birth - I took disposable and old knickers also. The first did not work for me. I felt like I was ill and this kind of fabric was just annoying me. Full brief knickers like granny style, 100% cotton worked for me. And they were not old, come on it is XXI century, we all have washing machines.
13. Dressing gown/spare nightwear - I think in my room temperature was about 25 degrees and it is a women hospital. I did not have room in my suitcase for gown so nope. And I was just fine without.
14. Snug fitting slippers with a slip resistant sole - definitely. But I take my slippers even when I go to hotel.
15. Dark coloured towel/one for each day - Yeah. Try to pack 3 towels or so. I had one, brown color.
16. Camera - we took some photos during labor and after delivery. We used also our phones, which were the fastest way of sharing our news.
17. Change for parking facilities/payphone - did not take any. We leave 3 minutes from hospital so we did not need to use parking. And honestly - is it not the thing which can be looked after by your partner? Payphone - everyone use just mobiles, I thing there is some restrictions, but nobody minded.
18. Light snacks, magazines, newspapers - I actually after few months without sugar, wanted a heavy snack. So I got donuts! But any fruit, healthy bars or so are great, especially when you breastfeeding and you starving same as your little one.
19. Own pillow in coloured pillow case (if desired) - I used my pregnancy pillow, it was great for breastfeeding and good additional support for back.
20. Hair ties/accessories - I had mine in hair and did not loose them!
21. Comfortable clothes to go home in (which fit you at 26 weeks pregnant) - you will be waiting for discharge anyway, so why your partner can not get that for you. That is what we did it. Freshly ironed maternity dress.
22. Mobile phone charger - I used power bank, so I was not limited by sockets or cables.
23. Any relevant prescribed medication - obvious!
24. Biro - I have been told I will have to write down all my observations about dirty and wet nappies. Even one of my friends said I will be obligated to use one brand of nappies as they have a strip which shows how much wee they soaked. Nope. I used in hospital eco nappies. No chemicals and nasty odors.

25. Long sleeved grows x 6 - it this case it is better to have more. You never know what pressure will reach first poo of your baby or if she/he will spit up.
Vests x 6 - I even think I used more vest as it was just very hot in ward. Although I could not squeeze my daughter in newborn size, even she was not the biggest baby. So we used only 0-3 months sizes.
26. Cardigan - used one when we were going home. 

27. Hat - one was necessary straight after birth and I took also second - for leaving hospital.
28. Pre washed baby towel - we did not want to bath our baby at hospital so I did not even take it from bag.
29. Pack of nappies (newborn size) - obvious, but for us it was just for our stay in hospital. We decided we will use after reusable nappies. Again Polish brand: Puppi. Only natural fabrics like wool, bamboo, cotton, linen or hemp. 

30. Cotton wool balls/pack - it was ok to have those. Just in case of small wash of eyes or face of baby but it just did not work with meconium. At all. Just get wipes. I really do recommend Irish brand Water wipes. I think they are a little bit more pricy than all those sensitive pampers or so, but they do have only two ingredients: water and grapefruit seeds extract. And cotton. No perfume. Just clear and very handy especially in hospital.
31. Baby bibs x 6 - did not use at all. But I think it is more for formula fed babies.
32. Baby blanket x 2 - even we got hospital one, that was just great to wrap my baby in our blanky and feel a little like home.
33. Cot sheet x 2 (optional) - same think like with blanket.
34. Car seat (to be brought in on the day you are going home) - we just walked home. If you do not leave far away do consider if you really want to waste your time in queue waiting for parking. We did not, so came back with buggy. 

I have heard many advices before I got to hospital, but I would not add anything to the list. Someone mentioned a bottle of water with the cup like you can just squash water for a quick perineal hygiene. But I found myself just using a shower or wet tissue and I healed normally. 

Going to hospital to have your first baby is such a new experience that you want to be prepared for anything. I think the best what you can do is be prepared with your partner as a team. He can always bring you whatever you need or he can just wipe your tears with sleeve. It does not really matter. What matters at this point is little part of you both lying just next to you. Get use to it. 

I am definietly a sweet tooth. As a person passionate in food I have read many articles about sugar and how bad is for our health, but it never took me off of eating smaller or bigger treats. But as my dad is diabetic, in my fifth month of pregnancy I had to do blood sugar test. Easy procedure, a bit time consuming, but overall nothing really bad. I ate tons of sugar day before. I don't know why, probably just cravings and then I went on morning for the test.
I was tested first after all night fasting. You are not allowed to have even a glass of water overnight. Once my hungry blood was taken I was given a huge jug of Lucozade. Disgusting. Honestly who drinks that? And then I had two test: after one hour and two hours. That's it.
Believe me I was shocked when I picked up phone same afternoon and midwife said I have gestational diabetes. One of my result wasn't correct and as they need to be very strict I was qualified as a diabetic. Hurray!
I did not know what does it mean at all. I was not even overweight and I never went on any diet. On the very next day I received a letter with few hints about foods which I should avoid. Goodbye  kinder chocolate bars, bye crispy white toast, farewell orange juice... So what I will eat?
In few days I was also invited for lifestyle class. I got a glucometer and started to check levels of sugar few times per day. I was totally down. Remember when I pinched myself with that little needle I was crying like a little child. My husband was the most supportive then ever. He hid all sweets and chocolates and promised after delivery I will get as many donuts as I will want. But for now I had to quit sugar and control all carbohydrates. I got use to it and I actually get in all pregnancy about 12 kg. My weight after diagnosis stopped for about 2 months and over all even hubby lost some kgs as he did not mind to avoid sugar with me. It is a horrible feeling when I just wanted something sweet so much!
I discovered pop corn. I never got a pop corn in cinemas before. I do like more this homemade version as I just buy good quality organic corn to avoid any burnings and I can add as much salt as I want or even some spices. That is the best evening snack which doesn't cause raise of sugar. I have to avoid my beloved beetroots. Watch portions and be careful with white flour. Also I found great low GI breads and if I don't go crazy my sugar is fine. I eat tons of grapefruits as those are the best diabetic fruit and there was even many research they can help in diabetes. I changed in my pantry regular white wheat flour for wholemeal and discovered spelt. After two months I found magic ingredient: xylitol! That's a carbohydrate made from birch, which is sweet like sugar but has very low GI. That meant I could come back to baking. It was a relief. I changed many regular recipes and found some kind of vegan or diet friendly combinations. Even more when I was doing regular recipes using xylitol instead of sugar I reduced the amount even half. I did not have anything sweet for two months so that level of sweetness was always fine for me. Birch sugar has many benefits. Does not have negative impact on teeth and gums so it is recommended for children. Even my mum, who sometimes has liver pains after a small treat did not feel anything. I became a huge fan of this specific and I am sure I will stay with xylitol after pregnancy just as an healthy option. There is obviously a minus: price. It is much more expensive then regular sugar. But if you do not really have a choice why not spend those few more euro?
If you want  give a try I think my favorite low GI cake with birch sugar is carrot cake. I changed my old recipe and found it same good as the previous version. Enjoy!

Carrot cake

Batter:

100g xylitol
2 eggs
150 ml rapeseed or sunflower oil
200 g whole wheat or spelt meal flour
1 tbsp of mixed spice
1 tsp soda bread

1 tsp baking powder
200 g carrot (peeled and grated)
zest of 1 lemon
1 handful of desiccated coconut

Icing:
125 g mascarpone
125 ml fresh cream

Set oven for 180°C and lie loaf tin with baking paper. Mix xylitol with eggs until fluffy and add oil. Stir in flour, spices, soda bread, baking powder to wet ingredients and then fold in carrot, zest and coconut. Transfer batter to the tin and bake for 35-40 min. To make icing beat cold cream until is fluffy and then add mascarpone. Spread on cake when is cold. You can sprinkle that with any kind of crushed nuts or lemon zest. Yumm!